Thinking lately, I have gone astray. Something has gone from me and that enthusiasm is gone. Writers block has come and go but I think the stresses of the beginning of the year with Cyclone Yasi has riddle my mind and my muse has really went somewhere to hide. Stressed to the max has given my muse a sense of outward awkwardness beyond compassion or retort – meaning I am not getting anything right.
Life seems to move so fast, that I wonder – why I am on this earth? Here I am wanting to cry for no apparent reason. Ha a man wanting to cry. Oh there is a reason why, but I strictly decided I cannot state the reason here. It is at this moment that I never thought I could live with such burdens but the weird things that happens is now only coming to mind. Stress has played all through these last few months since, and never thought it would the enemy – I am fighting.
Ha it is not a funny thing to self access of one’s actions but the thing I did should not have been done before you regret it(I am learning still new things, only hope I can learn from stupid mistakes). My brains (I might say something about my problem), sometimes never see the difference between much things until much later. Then you feel the world on your shoulders. I think I put a stop very quickly after I find out about the problem, hopefully it has work. Only time will tell.
Getting back to my muse, it decided to hide from me. But I have a suspicion that it hides on purpose for me, to train me and push my mental capacity in a way to perform on my own. I think it’s doing this now. Writing sometimes gets to be a tedious occupation if the muse and I don’t work together. And yet I think I babble on and rant on because I think it left me.
HAHA, I think its my self-doubt that plague me more than the muse. I seem to write okay now, by the way I am typing this. Well, this morning I woke up with such a nice day with thoughts of writing and stuff to do but it went the other way.
Well, breakfast is a pint of coffee and a good book to read. (Good book review coming.) Well I sit outside on a mild winter morning, taking in the lovely morning sun, to warm my body. (Note in the southern hemisphere its winter in Australia.) Oh by the way, Australia temperatures is relatively lower, in my town, the lowest is 8 degrees – 25 degrees. These temperatures are averages over a number of years. For instance, last year, in my town, two weeks of winter in the months of the end of May to end of August. If it gets cold in the last two weeks of May, it may have a longer winter. This winter season we had a reasonable winter so far. Only one problem in the Tropics there is no snow. However in the mountains in Victoria and Tasmania there is some snow. On occasions in the Tropics and depending on the temperature from South Australia, Victoria, New South Wales and Tasmania, frost could develop.
Getting back to reading the book and I heard a commotion, from three kittens. Well these three kittens are close to a year old; Timmy, he is like an old tom cat. He was after something which I heard him jumping on a metal stand. I looked up from my book and looked and thought he was after one of those geckos which was imported to Australia long ago. Our native geckos are slowly losing a grip. I continued reading and sipping my coffee, until I heard Timmy jump from the metal stand to the next flight of stairs. He was after something which I thought what. The most wanted of frogs who at this moment have slowly been dying off. The green tree frog sat on the parapet(it is a railing made of bricks. Parapet is a name I come to think of it.), that is when Jezabel decide to join in to play with the frog. The frog is about 10cm in length, and it jumped from the parapet to the downstairs railings; that is about four feet apart. Because of the two grey cats where hounding this frog, my pet decided to join in. By the time my cat decide to join in; the frog had jumped another four + feet to a cement pole on the veranda. Timmy had by then decided to try to jump up to catch the frog by placing his paws on the edges of the pole and climb it like a monkey. Twice more he tried and it made me laugh.
Gemma my black cat(my fifth black cat), decided to play. The poor frog had some faint scratch marks, and I couldn’t make the three stooges to let the frog go out of their minds. Nothing serious for the frog, I assure you all, then the frog miraculously jumped another four feet + more to where I was sitting, trying to read a book. Nothing prepared for the shock of jumping with horror for only a micro-second and then I laughed again. And at the same time I was getting frustrated with the three cats after the defenceless frog. The frog perched under the chair I was sitting on and about five minutes I felt an awkward feeling if I didn’t do something about this frog and bring to a higher position my cat and the other two cats decide to play and probability kill it from shock.
So my plan jumped in my head to move the wooden chair to the end of the patio/veranda where a screen block wall is there with one of those folding clothes line. Well I opened the screen door to the house and close by found a fly swat. With the fly swat, I urged on the frog to climb on it and then put the frog on the wall. The three cats were oblivious to the fact that I saved a green tree frog. Because the cat thought the frog was under the chair I sat on; they keep on sniffing if it, as it was there. It reminds me the cats are like a dog with a bone. Their curiosity soon ceased and I got to finished my breakfast and the book I was reading. I should not have checked my emails today and look at forums ever again, damn lost myself in the stress of things.
Well now I feel different, after having lunch and relating the story of my uneventful morning. The funny thing and the analogy of the frog, is true indeed:- Never give up. I think I started this post to relate something of a rant but eventually I found an epiphany.
A problem shared is a problem halved. I feel a little better. Note about the frog jumping is very true that I just went out to measure the distance. My eyes did see it no kidding.